Breakdown
by Ara Reed
Summary: He's lost everything, joined a group he hated in order to escape the one he hates more, and now Scorpia is back again to snatch him from the SAS' clutches. Not if he has anything to say about it! K-Unit and an enemy from Malagosto OC. REWRITE, updated regularly.
1. Author's Note

Hello! Long time, no see... at least for me. I've wanted to revamp this story for... years... and I think I've finally gathered up the courage to give it another shot! I'm rewriting Breakdown. I guess I'll keep the name, just for convenience's sake. It will be the same, very basic plot, but I'm changing up the storyline. I wrote this years ago, and while I like to think I'm a pretty good writer, I look back on this and kick myself for the logic lines and story development that I put into this. It deserved more thought and less fanaticism than I gave it, but I want to set it right and finally finish a story. I haven't finished it yet... in fact I just started it earlier tonight, so thank god my chapters were short and this isn't actually a long story, lol.

Also, I F***ING CALLED IT! I SO CALLED IT! Scorpia uses images of Alex being a badass to blackmail him in a political struggle?! That's right! Who called it, books in advance? I did! Hell yeah!

And ego trip over.

Any suggestions for the story or little side bits or lines I should slip in? Please, post a review and let me know! ^_^

Thank you,

Ara


	2. Catching up with Alex

Right, so before I begin I would like to know if you guys want me to keep the old story up. Should I post this as the first chapter, then the Author's note, then the old chapters, or should I just delete them? I feel like keeping them would make things more complicated...

But oh well... here is the first chapter of the revised story! I cannot guarantee how often I'll update... I have a crazy semester coming up (genetics, organic chemistry, statistics, and a rhetoric in writing class) so who knows how often I will update, or whether this isn't just a fluke of New Year cheer and I'm deluding myself into thinking I can actually finish a story... But thank you for reading anyway!

I'm a little sketchy on Alex Rider details, it's been so long since I've read the books and I'm not feeling up to researching them all again. I'm a biology major, I'm tired of research. But I would really appreciate it if you could let me know if I have any big blunders in here. The story is a tad changed. Alex was never adopted, and he has a little more contact with Fox than stated in the books, but only minor things have been changed. And let me know if Alex is OOC or anything, like I said, it's been a while!

But thank you everyone! I'm really sorry I never finished the story the first time, I hate it when someone just leaves you hanging like that for... years... and for that, I hate myself just a little, lol.

If you love the way it's changed, let me know. If you absolutely hate it, also let me know. I'm writing this for you guys!

Disclaimer: Alex Rider and associates are totally not mine, which is painfully obvious...

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Pain. Cold. Misery. Alex thought, imaging adjectives for the SAS while he went through his torturous pushups. Evil. Cruel. Wet. More pain. The exercise took his mind off his burning bullet wound, the old scar stretching and tearing, at least it felt like it, as he ran about. The doctor had said that the pain might never go away. Well, he was right. Nearly a year later, Alex could feel his heart ache with the old wound each time he moved, the pain only reappearing after his latest mission in Cairo, when they had sent him here.

One long month ago, Jack had been murdered in Egypt and his old unit had shown up on his vacated doorstep in order to drag him to headquarters and then immediately back to the SAS. Officially, he was here for his own protection. Just after Scorpia's last defeat there had been a break-in at MI6 headquarters. "We took care of the person who infiltrated HQ," Mrs. Jones had said calmly, "but they managed to send your file out in an email. We are having trouble tracing it."

Incredulous, he had fought their decision tooth and nail, ending up with nothing to show for it except to be embarrassed in front of his Unit. Shot down like a child while they silently stood behind him, at attention by the door. He had heard Wolf snicker once or twice as he tried to formulate an argument without letting any sensitive information go. It hadn't been pretty, and it hadn't been effective.

Alex had thought that his and Wolf's relationship would be decent after Point Blanc and the get-well card, but apparently the argument in Mrs. Jone's office had proved to him that Alex was still just a brat, albeit a brat that could snowboard on a an ironing board. He was still Double o' Nothing. No respect. He couldn't tell them of his missions (not that he particularly wanted to, although it might have made some things easier to explain), he had to control the nightmares by himself, and had to hide his scars by changing in the bathroom to avoid curious questions that he could not answer. He was surprised K-Unit hadn't snuck in yet and dragged him out naked or something, just to see what he was hiding. It wouldn't be out of character, they were worse than his old schoolmates.

Yet here he was, being driven through the muck and the mud by his tormentors, who were comfortably riding in a Jeep alongside him. He had been running for what felt like hours, and after every kilometer he had to stop and do thirty pushups. His body felt like it was going to break apart, his lungs were rasping, his heart was burning, and his toes were numb with cold. "Faster, Cub!" Wolf screamed over the roar of the Jeep. Eagle laughed, Snake glared at Wolf, and the new kid just smiled.

With a grunt, Alex pushed forward. He would wipe the grin off Wolf's face if it killed him, which at this rate might be exactly what he was doing to himself. Then his foot caught in the slime and he plummeted face first into the mud with a loud slap. This was nowhere near as dangerous or arduous as any of his missions, but it occurred to Alex that his life had suddenly it a new low.

And then the pain set in. His chest felt like it was being torn in two, but he screamed into the mud to muffle the noise, clutching his heart in a spasm. The Jeep beside him slammed on its brakes and Snake rushed out, concern written on his face. He was the only one that gave a single shit about him. Maybe he knew about his wound, maybe he didn't, but he had been the only one to notice the way that Alex rubbed the skin above his heart. He was doing it more and more often lately. He definitely suspected something.

Alex pushed himself onto his knees, ready to get up. The only thing worse than outright hostility was pity, and that was all he felt from Snake. He could deal with the pain, would deal with it, and no one would say a thing about his outburst. It was how the SAS worked. You weren't a coward if you kept going. Hiding his chest, he stumbled to his soaked feet and bent over, hands on his knees.

"You okay, kid?"

"Fine." He grunted. His chest throbbed dully and he resisted the urge to rub the spot with his knuckles.

"Need a rest?" He asked quietly, sounding like Fox.

"I'm fine." He responded testily. He was fully capable of finishing this. He wasn't one to be coddled, especially by a teammate. He hated these people, but he wasn't going to let them down.

Snake gave him a look. "You're just a kid, Cub. Don't hurt yourself because you can't take the blow to your pride."

Alex only sighed. But then he had to go and open his big mouth. He didn't think he could take the secrecy much longer without some sort of comment. "Trust me, whatever they can think of can't be any worse than what I've already been through." Snake gave him that look again. He started to talk, but was interrupted by Wolf.

"Get in the car, Snake. Double o' Nothing only has a couple kilometers left, and I want to get home by dark." Alex glared. It was only three in the afternoon.

With one last backward glance, Snake rushed back to the Jeep. The sooner they got back to base, the sooner he could examine Cub.

Alex started jogging, not caring that he had fallen far behind the Jeep. He could see it dip in and out of vision over the short but steep hills. They could stop if they wanted to. He shouldn't have opened up to Snake, not even that little bit. It set a bad precedent. But he felt like he was going to explode! All this building tension, pain, guilt, loneliness, it was too much to take alone. Too much too soon after Jack's death. Before he had thought that his life had been bad, but now he didn't know how it could get any worse.

There was no more moral support. No more Jack, no home. The only person who actually cared about him was Fox, and God only know where he was. He hadn't seen Tom since the sniper attack. They were still friends, but there was no way to contact him from the base, not that Alex felt like putting him in more danger. His home was sitting empty, probably with some squatter playing with his XBOX, pawning his uncle's valuables. Either that or MI6 had sold it out from under him. He wouldn't put it past them.

The pressure was always piling up. His nightmares had come back with force after Jack's death, and it was all he could do to keep from screaming at night. He just lay there, rolled in a sweaty ball, trying to push the images from his mind. Snake had caught him at it one night, it was probably why he was so gentle towards him, but the pity felt oppressive. Memories haunted him during training, making it difficult to process and pay attention. He was slipping deeper and deeper, and he didn't know how long it would be until he lost it. But this was all he had going for him, no matter how much he hated it, it was a future. A future other than MI6.

The more he thought about it as he ran, the more frustrated he became. It was a nervous twitch now, the urge to move, to do something to let out the energy. He ran harder, aware of the pain in his chest but attempting to push through it. Ignore it. Not allow it to influence him. But just like everything in his life, something snapped and the world tipped forwards into dakness.

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	3. K-Unit

Hello everyone! Thanks for the reviews! And thank you, **Lightning and Blossoms** for pointing out that it hadn't been two years... for some reason I thought MI6 had left him alone for longer, lol. I will fix that immediately!

This chapter is filler, just so you know. I'm trying to develope the characters a little bit so that K-Unit aren't the normal "Wolf is a complete asshole, and Eagle is an idiot" scenerio. Let me know if it doesn't work for you, I'll keep trying till it makes sense! I'm still new at this so all the help is appreciated!

Thanks everyone for reading!

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Wolf and company had lost Cub amongst the hills, far behind. Snake was whining in his ear again, about the dangers of pushing the kid and how he was obviously tired and in pain. As far as Wolf was concerned, the kid could run until he fell over from exhaustion.

Snake snapped out another useless comment, grimacing in righteous fury at his lack of response. Wolf just drove on.

He really didn't expect Snake to grab hold of the wheel and shove him bodily from the doorless vehicle.

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It didn't take much to push Wolf from the car, just a foot and something to rest against to take the opposing force. Snake grabbed at the wheel before the Jeep could spin out of control and turned the car around, Wolf running after the car and bellowing threats.

Cub wasn't okay, Snake knew that he was right and that the kid shouldn't be out of his sight. Something bad could happen.

He tried to take the same route back in order to intercept the kid, but frankly everything looked the same, and they had taken a winding trail, attempting to keep from flipping over on the steep slopes. But after a few minutes, Snake knew he wouldn't be able to find the old route. He tried running strategic, serpentine movements through the hills, hoping that by searching such a large swathe of area he would spot Cub running. There was nothing.

Eventually, he gave up. Cub knew the way back, and he would get there eventually. Besides, no one would appreciate a search party just because Snake was worried about 'the kid.' _Give Cub some credit._ Snake thought. _Hadn't he proven himself at least that capable over the last month?_

But he fretted nonetheless.

It took another half an hour to come across Wolf, who was trudging the last kilometer back to base, not bothering to run. He had nowhere to be.

Wolf glared at Snake as he reclaimed his spot in the driver's seat, shoving Snake over. "The fuck, Snake?" He growled.

"You were being an ass, Wolf. Cub's been running all day, he's barely had any rests and he's just a kid. We can't keep pushing him like this. It's not right, and we're going to end up damaging him instead of protecting him."

"Protecting him from what?!" Moose asked from the back seat. "Who could a kid piss off so bad that he needs the SAS to protect him? I figure Wolf is right, Cub is just some politico's son, in danger because of his dad." Snake figured that his new team mate was a git. Then again, Wolf was being a git too, so he didn't know what to believe anymore.

"And so what? Is that something Cub has control over? He's a decent guy, he takes care of himself, he puts up with your guys' shit. It's more than can be asked of you, Wolf. Or you, Moose! You guys are acting like highschool bullies to him. Is this the SAS, or a playground?!" Snake yelled, pointing a finger back at Moose. He had never liked him.

The guy was slobbish and had to comment on everything. He thought he had a right to be a member of the group without earning it, he hadn't been here long enough to so comfortably insult Cub. The string of replacements after Fox had been long, none lasting more than a few months. Nothing serious had occurred, but connections were never made, trust was not built, and the fit had always been more of a hindrance than a benefit. Moose was not the best of these, and Snake didn't think the guy would last much longer.

"Why are you treating Cub like this? It's obvious he's having a hard time, we aren't making any of this easier on him." Snake entreated, remembering the night he had found a sweating, whimpering Cub in his cot, curled around his blankets. His nightmares had gotten worse as the weeks went on, he could hear them sometimes since his cot was the closest to Cub's.

"He acts so calm and cool, like this is nothing to him. He's all high and mighty, and frankly, how do you know he's such a decent guy? The kid hasn't opened his mouth since he got here." Wolf grunted. "I get it, he can do some pretty impressive things, but he's under my command. He doesn't have the right to act better than us. He doesn't even have the right to be here! We get ridiculed because of this brat and he doesn't have the decency to let us know why. We don't know a thing about Cub. I know more about him than you guys do and all I know is that his name is Alex something, he can snowboard with an ironing board, and he got me shot."

Snake paused. He had to say something. "Cub is sick. Something is wrong with him."

"Like what?" Wolf scoffed.

"He keeps grabbing his chest like he's in pain. He doesn't eat, he doesn't sleep. He has these crazy nightmares almost every night. There's something wrong, Wolf." Snake said cautiously.

"Like what?" Wolf repeated in the same tone. "So his chest hurts and he has nightmares. That's not exactly a diagnosis."

"His chest, right above his _heart_." Snake snapped. "That's not something I want to take chances with, Wolf."

Eagle grabbed the back of Snake's chair and pulled himself into the conversation. "You know, Snake's right. Cub doesn't eat much… actually, he barely eats anything. And I've heard him have a nightmare or two, we all do so I didn't think anything of it, but I'm starting to wonder about Cub. He just doesn't seem right. He was quiet when he was here last time, but it's not the same this time around. He's downright silent." He said worriedly. "I think we should go back for Cub, I'm afraid he'll do something stupid."

"Just to be safe." Snake said, staring Wolf down.

Wolf sighed. "Yeah. You might be right." He responded, the seed of doubt growing. "We'll get to camp and ask around to see if he beat us there. He should be back by now, but if he's not, we'll form a search team and go looking."

There was a lull in the conversation as each of the members thought, finally broken by Eagle. "Why do you guys think Cub's here?" He asked.

"We know what they told us, that he's here for his own protection." Moose answered.

"Yeah, but we've seen Cub in action the last month. He can take care of himself." Snake commented.

"Not from the guys I've seen him tangle with." Wolf said. "He can be pretty high profile when he wants to be. It's possible that it is just for protection, but this isn't exactly the best place for it."

"Oh, I don't know. This is a top secret camp filled with Britain's elite soldiers…" Eagle commented with a sly smile.

"Elite, my ass. A fourteen year old got in." Moose scoffed good humoredly.

"Yeah, well, Cub wasn't your average fourteen year old." Wolf said. The rest of the Unit grinned.

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	4. Finding Cub

So, school has started... I have a few chapters already written up, but since I have to write papers for all of my Organic Chem labs (one a week) and a whole bunch of papers for my English class, so my writing time has been eaten up. Sorry!

I swear I'll get to the meat of the story soon, just hold on a bit longer!

Enjoy!

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It was after dark that Snake finally forced Wolf to put together a search team. He was the team leader, so he had to give his 'okay' when going up the command to the Sargent in order to organize the other Units. No one had a problem with looking for Cub, in fact a lot of the Units had respect for him, but Wolf didn't want to make a big deal out of nothing. Unfortunately, Snake had a point when he said that being missing for hours was not nothing.

An army of Jeeps were deployed in the direction of where Cub was last seen, all equipped with flood lights and bullhorns. The kid would be found, Wolf was sure. After all, like Eagle had said, they were Britain's elite.

The rest of the Units were settled into search patterns, covering all the ground that Cub could have traversed, while K-Unit went back to the place where they had last seen him. Cub wasn't there, but they didn't expect him to be. Cub had been running when they last saw him.

"He was going that way." Moose pointed in the direction of the camp. "And he had a decent pace on him."

"Yeah, we'll run the serpentine search pattern in that direction and see if he didn't fall or something." Wolf said. Snake sighed but didn't say anything. He had already ran the same pattern in the daytime, but he wasn't actually sure he had searched the right area. It all looked the same to him.

They went back and forth over the hills, and, with a good 20 feet of flood light on either side of the Jeep, they ran 40 foot intervals between the search lines. Snake called from the bullhorn calmly and professionally, calling Cub's name. There was no reply.

Finally, Eagle caught something out of the corner of his eye. "Yo, Wolf. There's something on the ground, three o'clock!" He yelled slapping roof of the Jeep with a hand. He was sitting on the top of the slow moving vehicle.

The Jeep revved and pulled up next to some brush and there he was, in his camouflage. Cub was face down on the ground and not moving.

Snake leapt from the vehicle, and was instantly down on the ground, turning the kid over to check his vitals.

"Get him some blankets, he must be freezing!" Eagle called, jumping from the Jeep. Moose jumped in the back to make space and gather some blankets.

"He's unresponsive, but his pupils are contracting." Snake said, shining a small flashlight in the kid's eyes. "He's unconscious." Moose ran up with the blankets and a radio. Wolf was already calling in that they found Cub on the ground, so Snake dialed into the camp emergency line to talk to the camp paramedics. "We found Cub in quadrant 6, we're bringing him now."

"Copy, we are prepared for the patient. Radio in condition while in route."

Snake didn't bother to answer, he just signaled to Moose to help him gently wrap Cub in the blankets and get him in the back of the Jeep. As soon as everyone was in, Wolf took off in the direction of the camp, careful not to hit too many potholes.

"I have an unresponsive teenage male, his pupils are contracting to light, but his breathing is shallow and his pulse is erratic. He is probably suffering from exposure as well." Snake said into the radio, Cub's head cradled in his lap so that it didn't bounce around during the drive.

"Can you ascertain what the main health risk is yet?" Someone from the radio asked professionally.

"No. I am assuming it may be a heart issue, he has been having chest pains." Snake said, looking up at his Unit. Eagle and Moose looked back, grim. Wolf drove on, a little faster than before.

"Does he have any conditions to do with his heart?"

"We do not know, we are not privy to his file."

"Well… neither are we." The voice responded. Even he sounded grim.

"We're here!" Wolf yelled over the engine before he pulled up to the infirmary.

Snake and Moose were out the door as soon as the vehicle stopped. Snake marveled at how light Cub was before they got him through the door and onto a stretcher.

"Any new developments?" A young man asked as he rushed the stretcher through some double doors. It was the same voice that he had talked to over the radio.

"No, same as before."

"Okay."

They had rolled Cub into a room and began cutting away at the kid's clothes. First went the army issue combat rain jacket and boots, then another, warmer jacket that was soaked with mud. Snake felt a sense of foreboding as he saw the t-shirt underneath. There was only a little blood on it, but it was positioned just above where his heart should be.

They cut away the white t-shirt and Snake got his first glimpse of Cub's torso. It wasn't smooth, like it was supposed to be, but riddled with scars and angry red marks. And above his heart, a tight mass of scar tissue, veined with other scars and bruising. It bled sluggishly, so it was only a surface wound, Snake thought thankfully, but that left what was happening beneath. There was only one clue that Snake had to help answer that, and he didn't like it one bit.

That scar had been a bullet wound.

After preliminary health checks, which Snake insisted on helping with, he was pushed out and told to wait in the lounge with the rest of his Unit as Cub was rolled away to receive a CT scan. There were no outward signs of why Cub would have fallen down. He hadn't hit his head, any bruising would have shown by now. He didn't have an obvious neurological disorder, as shown by his pupils. His breathing elevated to normal while in the room, but his pulse was still off. Snake had hoped he had been wrong, but something was definitely happening with Cub's heart.

The rest of K-Unit sat silently on the bench seats. Snake could see them from the door, but he didn't feel like entering.

"What's up? How is he?" Eagle asked, standing and stretching.

"He's… has anyone been notified of Cub being hurt?" Snake started, then trailed off in confusion.

"Just the appendicitis." Wolf grunted.

"How long ago was that?" Snake asked.

"About a year, why?"

"Cub's been shot." The rest of K-Unit jumped to their feet. "Not recently!" Snake cried, motioning for them to sit again. "He has a circular scar above his heart. He was shot in the chest."

"He was shot in the heart?!" Wolf growled angrily.

"If he was shot in the heart he'd be dead." Moose snarked, pointing out Wolf's faulty logic.

"He was shot _near_ his heart. It couldn't have been a direct hit, but something must have been damaged. Cub's pulse is erratic and it doesn't seem to be stabilizing. They're doing some tests now. He seems to be fine, but unconscious." Snake sank into one of the chairs nearby. He felt suddenly exhausted.

"Yeah, he _seemed_ just fine for the last month! Are you trying to tell me he was like this the entire time?" Wolf practically yelled. There was flash of worry in his eyes, finally realizing that he had put Cub in danger with all of his intense training.

"No, it could be a new injury from a weak valve or something, who knows what happened, which organs were damaged, or how they were affected. The doctors aren't allowed to look at his medical file, Cub's too classified." Snake put his head in his hands. He wanted to sleep, but it didn't feel right when his teammate was in the emergency room.

Eagle shook his head. "Are you kidding me?"

"No," said a familiar voice from the doorway. Cub's doctor was back. "We can't see his file." He said bluntly.

Snake snapped fully awake. "How is he?"

"He's stable and resting. He appears to be okay and his pulse is back to normal, but he needs to stay here for monitoring." He said calmly. There was a collective sigh of relief. "We took a CT scan. Preliminary results show nothing out of the ordinary, but I'll go over them in more detail later. A heart condition is not something you play around with." He raised his eyebrows at K-Unit, obviously expecting an explanation. He got none.

"We have him on antibiotics to kill any cold or pneumonia he could have contracted from the exposure. We cleaned up a few wounds, including some stretching and lacerations on his chest next to his bullet wound. It appears Cub has put on some extra muscle in the past month, it stretched and tore his scar, but it shouldn't leave any lasting damage except make his scar look bigger.

"We recommend bed rest and for him to take it easy. All this crazy training will only do him in." He said gently, giving each member of K-Unit a cold stare. "Mysterious heart beats are notoriously hard to diagnose. Even though we don't know what the problem is yet, he obviously has one. Keep that in mind." Then he turned a small smile on Snake. "You should get some rest, all of you. You won't be any help here."

Snake stood slowly and shook the man's hand. "My name is Dr. Epps, in case you need to get ahold of me. Have a good night men."

They left Cub in capable hands, Snake was sure. But Cub's condition bothered him, bothered everyone. K-Unit went to bed quietly that night, no horseplay or mild taunting. They all felt the emptiness of the cot at the end of the room a little too much for their comfort.

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	5. Waking Up

Onwards, with the story! I've no new news this week other than Organic lab is actually rather fun (surprisingly) and my parrot, Bastardly Bill (I feel like I should make a tiny ten gallon hat for him and little birdy cowboy boots, hehehe) will not leave me alone! He won't stop bothering me!

Enjoy,

Ara

PS. The chapter is longer this time!

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It was a long and slow ascent to consciousness. Alex didn't feel like he was ready for it, for once he was allowed to rest and felt too fuzzy to think. It felt heavenly, every tired bone and bruise felt stretchy, like they were finally healing. He didn't want to wake up and face the next day at Brecon Beacons, but that had never stopped him before. He had always opened his eyes and stepped forward, and he would do so for the rest of his life. _There ain't no rest for the wicked_, he thought ruefully.

He didn't expect to open his eyes to monitors and white walls, though. He twitched his fingers in sudden discomfort. He hated hospitals.

He lifted his eyes to the door, where a nurse was quietly entering the room. She saw his open eyes and smiled genially. "I'll be right back with your doctor." She said, and slipped back out of the room. Alex tried to call after her, tried to ask her to wait, but nothing came out of his throat but a rasp.

True to her word, the doctor entered only moments later. He was a young man, with olive skin and curly hair. He smiled slowly, and Alex suddenly wondered if he was slow because he was gentle or because it was calming to the patients. Either way, he could respect that.

"Cub, I am Dr. Epps. Do you know where you are?" He asked.

"I'm in a hospital?" Alex breathed, very little of the sentence came out as audible, but the doctor got the gist.

"Yes, you are at the Brecon Beacons infirmary." He gave a half smile and poured a glass of water for Alex. He half sat up, feeling weak but functional, and drank deeply. "You're here because you had a bad fall out in the hills and disappeared for a few hours. Do you remember anything about that?"

"Um. I remember a pain… in my chest. Then everything went black." He said, his voice returning slowly.

"Were you running especially quickly?" He asked, no specific inflection in his voice to give away what his line of questioning was.

"Yeah, I was running pretty hard. I was trying to catch up with the Jeep, K-Unit left me behind." Alex lied. He had run faster because he was angry, and he had tried to occupy his brain before he could think too much.

"Well, you spent a few hours unconscious on the ground."

"Oh." Was all Alex could say. A few hours? How many was that?

"Yep. The entire camp was pretty concerned about you, especially your Unit. They were the ones that found you. If you had been out there any longer, you would probably have suffered from hypothermia, as well as the rest of it."

"The rest of it?" Alex asked confused.

The doctor sighed. "Cub, we can't access your file because of your classification, but I know a bullet scar when I see one. I can infer that since it is right above your heart and you were admitted for an irregular pulse that it was damaged, once upon a time. Well, that might have come back to haunt you." His slight smile waned.

"We took a CT scan and a few other tests, they all came back inconclusive, but that doesn't really mean much. We don't have all the capabilities of a real hospital here, but you aren't cleared to go off base to a real hospital, so you're going to have to work with me here. How did you get that scar? And don't say it's classified, I don't care and I won't tell anyone."

Alex sighed, defeated. "I was shot by a sniper. It missed my heart, but nicked an artery and ricocheted out beneath my armpit. There was a bunch of medical terms in there, but that's all I really understood. They said I was really lucky that I was so young, because my body was able to stem the blood flow through that artery or something. I was drugged up when they told me, so I don't have the best memory of it." He finished lamely. It had been a year since the accident, and he hadn't really wanted to know in the first place. He had just wanted to know how to get better and get out of there.

"There was no damage to your heart?" The doctor asked.

"None that I know of, but like I said. I don't really understand this kind of stuff." Alex shrugged.

Dr. Epps looked thoughtful for a moment. "How have you been feeling lately? Is your appetite okay, your sleep habits good?"

"I haven't felt very good since I got here. I try to eat, but I'm not very hungry, and they don't let me sleep much." Alex said, brushing past his nightmares.

"How hard have they been working you?" The doctor checked a chart at the end of his bed, asking the question almost absentmindedly.

"Pretty hard."

The man nodded. "You've gained weight, according to your chart, but lost quite a bit of fat. The extra muscle you've gained in your pectoral region opened up your scar, so there is significant muscle growth, and only in one month… I would assume K-Unit works you _very_ hard." He admonished, waving the chart at Alex. "Work with me here, kid. I can't put everything together myself. You could have a very dangerous heart condition, and we need to understand how you aggravated it. I assume that this is a new thing since you came to Brecon Beacons?"

"Yeah, I might have hurt it during my last mission, but I was sent here just after, so yeah, it's new." He said, giving in. The doctor was right, it was stupid to put his life at risk.

"I know you can't talk about your mission, but was there something specific? Some action you took that you think could have started all this?"

"I… not really." Alex said cautiously, trying to think. He still felt rather fuzzy. "It didn't start to hurt until afterwards. It was an ache… like I sprained something…" One hand raised to his chest and he wanted to rub at his heart, but felt the bandage and remembered what the doctor had said. His scar was torn.

"You said you hadn't been sleeping well lately." He waited for Alex to nod. "Have you been feeling overly weak, more than just tired or sleepy?" The man looked him in the eye, trying to gauge Alex's answer.

"I don't know, I haven't really run off of this little sleep before for so long." Alex said, staring him right back in the eye. He didn't want to talk about the nightmares.

Dr. Epps' eyes narrowed. "That's funny, because I requested a schedule from K-Unit of your activities from the last few weeks. I would say that six hours a night isn't exactly adequate, but I find it hard to believe that you haven't run on a schedule like that before. You're a teenager, Cub." He said by way of explanation.

This was a smart doctor.

Silence reigned in the room.

"You're lying to me." He said, whatever had been left of his smile was gone now, replaced with worried lines and narrowed eyes. Cub didn't say anything, afraid of digging his grave even deeper.

The doctor sighed and put down the chart. "I guess all I can do is try and explain what happened, maybe that will knock some sense into you." He commented ruefully. "You were missing for nearly six hours. Thankfully, the Units sent out a search party for you soon after dark, so you weren't exposed to the cold for too long. K-Unit found you, and reported in your position.

"They found you face down, Cub. Your breathing was shallow, your pulse was erratic, you were unconscious, and no one could wake you. Your breathing returned to normal shortly after you were admitted, but your pulse remained irregular for another hour.

"That in and of itself might not sound so scary to you, but the fact that you would not wake up and have had previous heart trauma is very troubling. Heart problems are very serious issues, Cub." He gestured to his own heart, where it beat inside his chest. "You only get one."

Cub was still quiet, but this time in contemplation.

The doctor threw one last look at the young man and then gave up. "Just think on that. I'll be back with some pain meds and sleeping pills. Snake said you've been in pain lately, and above all else you need to rest. You've run yourself ragged." He ran a hand through his hair in frustration as he turned and left, and Alex felt as if he was cheating this doctor. He cared, Alex could tell, and he knew that he was only making the doctor's job more difficult, but Alex didn't see how his nightmares connected to his heart condition. Alex was a need to know kind of person, and his doctor didn't really need to know.

When the man returned, Alex tried to give him a small smile. He didn't want to seem unappreciative, but he took the sleeping pills with relish all the same and sighed as Dr. Epps put more pain medicine in his IV drip. "Nothing too potent." He had mentioned. "It's just to take the edge off."

Then he left, and Alex slipped off into darkness and silence. He should really savor it while it lasted.

* * *

He awoke faster the second time. Light was glaring through the window and it appeared to be mid-afternoon. He couldn't remember if it was day or night the last time he'd been awake.

Alert and feeling the need to relieve himself, he pressed the call button for the nurse. She arrived promptly and unhooked him from the machinery and the IV. "You don't really need that anymore, we were just worried you were dehydrated." She said with a smile and then left to let Alex go about his business.

K-Unit arrived shortly after. Only Snake and Wolf visited with him. Snake in a medical capacity and Wolf in an official, and almost personal capacity.

Snake was first. He came in and debriefed Alex on all that had happened, got his story of how the day went in order to put it into the report. An entire base of army professionals was mobilized to find him and he was found injured, so of course there was a report. He gave a graceful account of the day, keeping to the minimum facts and not pointing any fingers, he was good at these kind of things by now.

Wolf, on the other hand, started out with an apology, of sorts.

"You should have asked for more breaks." He said when he walked in.

Alex, feeling more feisty after some sleep replied, "You should have been less of an ass."

Wolf grunted appreciatively, and the rest of the visit went more smoothly. He never said the apology outright, but Alex could see it in his demeanor and the way that his eyes kept shifting back to the beeping machines (which were hooked up to him again). Wolf attempted to gather some more information on his health, rather clumsily Alex thought, but Alex wasn't saying much and Wolf didn't push. He wasn't a different person from before, he was still abrasive and offensive and rather sarcastic, but now Alex saw the human part of him. As weak as it was, it gave Alex some hope for when he got out of the infirmary.

Then a nurse came to change the bandages on his chest. She said it was really only a flesh wound, but it would be a hard wound to heal, considering how it was created. The edges kept moving do to the skin around it being so tight and stretched.

After they left he was alone for a while. He kept his mind busy by flipping on a tiny television located in the corner and absently watching the wind blow outside. It moved the tree branches back and forth, and Alex wondered if there was going to be a storm because of the changing winds. He supposed any distraction was a good distraction.

Then Dr. Epps showed up.

He had that worried look again, like he had been thinking too hard and found an answer that he didn't quite like.

"Is everything okay?" Alex asked, becoming worried himself.

"Yes, the tests are still normal." He said absently, then switched topics. "Cub, I know you were unwilling to talk about your sleeping habits with me before, but your answers are very important. Is there a reason you are sleeping so little?"

Alex shook his head.

"You aren't waking up suddenly, out of breath? Not sweating excessively or snoring especially loud?" He asked pointed. Again Alex shook his head.

"Are you having strange dreams, or nightmares?" And for a second Alex paused to question his earlier assumption about his dreams not being important. Dr. Epps picked up on that pause very quickly.

He fiddled with the chart in his hand as he slowly sat down and looked pointedly at his charge. "Cub, I think I may know the main issue here. You do have a heart condition, and I think that you should get that checked out as soon as you get off base, but I believe that the trigger to it may be… psychological."

Alex frowned. _Psychological?_ Alex thought in near outrage.

"I believe you may have an anxiety or stress disorder…" Alex began to protest, but the doctor held up a hand. "Let me finish and then you can tell me to shove it."

"I believe you have an anxiety or stress disorder. It is not uncommon in high risk environments, such as your mysterious work for MI6 or the SAS training. Sometimes, the pressure builds too high, often revealing itself in night terrors, or nightmares, or even physiologically. Many people with these disorders say that they can feel their heart race or skip at times, they feel like they can't breathe, even though they are getting plenty of oxygen, some even push themselves too far and their vital signs react violently and dangerously. Others say that they can feel their heart ache, although I would say that your own pains are much more real than other patient's complaints.

"This much stress is not good for your heart, especially after the trauma from the bullet. It may have triggered an episode. Your lack of sleep and appetite only added to the stress, finally causing you to collapse, exhausted, in the hills." He finished.

"I don't have it…" Alex started, but Dr. Epps cut him off.

"Just answer me this, Cub. You seem like a calm and collected person, able to take on pretty much anything that life can throw at you. There had to have been some sort of trigger or event for this to affect you so. Have there been any large life changes or tragedies in your life recently?" Which was exactly the thing to say to stir up doubt in Alex's mind.

_Jack._

Alex ignored his chain of thought and marveled at this doctor's intelligence again. He was a sneaky bastard. "Well, I am here, aren't I?" He snarked back, unwilling to be drawn into any more of the doctor's theories. He didn't want to think any more. He wanted to watch the wind play in the trees and watch more mindless television.

The doctor's face fell a fraction, but then he saw Alex's blank expression and realized that he may have gotten through after all. "Yeah. I suppose that is a rather large change." He said lamely. "I think it's about time for you to have an early night, Cub. You still need to rest up and recuperate. K-Unit wants you back as soon as possible."

"Yeah." Alex replied absently. But before the doctor could leave he yelled after him, "Hey! Could I possibly get some more of those sleeping pills?" The doctor nodded encouragingly and went to go get them.

He stared down at his hand, with the pills in his palm, after everyone left the room. He mused at the irony of running away from his problems, but skirted any real issues that he had. He couldn't deal with them right now, not with all these people around. Not with all this noise. Not now… maybe not ever, because it was too hard to believe. And he didn't want to believe it.

He knocked back the pill with some water and waited for it to take effect. The sun was above the horizon, but Alex knew it wouldn't take much longer before it was dark outside. Maybe he would think over what the doctor said tomorrow. And then he drifted peacefully off to sleep.

* * *

There was a soft brush against his forehead with something cold, and the chill made Alex's face wrinkle in sleepy discomfort. But an ominous click followed, something familiar that he had heard a lot over the last year and a half.

His eyes snapped open, but he dared not move his head. The barrel of the pistol was settled against his temple and the cold steel burned where it touched him.

"Alex Rider." A voice in the darkness spoke nearby. "It's time to wake up."

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	6. The Walk

Hello! Now that I'm getting into the story I'm having a bit of trouble getting it quite right. If you guys have any suggestions, feel free to shoot me a review!

- Ara

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_There was a soft brush against his forehead with something cold, and the chill made Alex's face wrinkle in sleepy discomfort. But an ominous click followed, something familiar that he had heard a lot over the last year and a half._

_His eyes snapped open, but he dared not move his head. The barrel of the pistol was settled against his temple and the cold steel burned where it touched him._

_"Alex Rider." A voice in the darkness spoke nearby. "It's time to wake up."_

* * *

Alex breathed deeply, his muddled mind trying to comprehend what was happening. On a shallow level he knew that the sleeping pills were wreaking havoc with his senses, making him not function right, but he couldn't seem to reach much deeper. He wasn't capable of reacting fast enough to protect himself.

Which was probably why he hadn't been shot yet, because he hadn't moved. _Just lying here like a dead fish,_ he thought. So far they hadn't shot him, but that might change.

"Get out of bed." The gunman instructed calmly. The gun receded and Alex moved to sit up. "Slowly." The man snapped with more anxiety. Alex slowed down and carefully pushed away the sheets.

It was a group of men, maybe five or six, all balaclava clad. They melted into the darkness.

He was bare-chested, but thankfully clad in hospital pajama pants and not one of those silly open backed dresses, since they marched him out the door without regard for him being half naked.

Dr. Epps was outside the door on the ground, gasping and bleeding. Alex stared in shock, and not a little horror. That man had tried to help him, tried to heal him, and perhaps had even saved his life. And now he was breathing his last breath.

One of the men grabbed him by the elbow and pushed him past the body, but clumsily, Alex fought back. He tried to rush to the man's aid, but the sleep meds and slippery floor made it nearly impossible to fight against the man that had grabbed him. A fist rammed into his stomach, and they pulled him, choking from the building.

The only saving grace was that, coughing on the floor for a moment, he spotted the hem of a nurses' scrubs peeking out from beneath a desk. All he could do was hope that she would be able to help the doctor and leave with the men so that she could get to him.

Outside, Alex could tell that it was only early evening. The sun had set, but all of the lights in camp were still on. The area seemed empty though. No men were roaming between the buildings, no recruits were getting lost or taking up some extra training.

As they passed by the huts, one of the gunman would systematically enter and inspect the small buildings, clearing them of occupants. Eventually they came across one with a man inside. Instead of entering and attacking as Alex thought they would, they marched Alex up to the front door and showed him off as a hostage.

His boots felt heavy as he took the steps, dread filling his chest. He felt his breath catch. The gunman kicked open the door and made sure that Alex could be seen clearly through the doorway with a gun to his head. The SAS man took a moment to process the situation, sitting up from his cot with an instruction manual in his hands.

"Hey Cub." He said cautiously, but supremely calm. He'd apparently handled these situations before.

"Hiya Raven." Alex said solemnly, apology in his tone. The image of Dr. Epps on the ground flashed through his mind and his breath shortened. He wouldn't fight back.

"Put your hands behind your head and step out of the building. If you attack or attempt to escape we will shoot the kid." The leader said clearly.

Raven complied. There was nothing else he could do, or he would be shot as well.

This happened with another man, and a third caught by surprise outside his hut. All three SAS men were secured as hostages before the group started to head towards the mess hall. Through a little threatening, the gunmen, and therefore Alex, found out that the recruits were all on a survival course and would be gone throughout the night so the camp was half empty. None of the SAS men mentioned that the entire camp was at mess though.

"You say anything, we kill the kid." The leader said tonelessly. "If you do anything, we kill the kid. Your friends do anything, we kill the kid and the rest of you. Kid, if you do anything, we kill everyone we can." He finished darkly, shoving Alex's head to the side with the barrel of his gun, as they gathered outside the mess hall.

It turned out that it was fairly easy to take the entire camp of SAS men hostage. It wasn't like they had cell phones to secretly call for help, or carried weapons around with them at all times. They were supposed to be safe here, so what was the point?

First, the men with the three SAS hostages entered, using the large men as shields and directing the rest of the men to cram against the back of the room. They complied, of course. These were their men. Sure, they knew the risks of being a soldier and all that, but with no weapons besides knives and forks and their own hands, there was little hope of both getting their teams and themselves out of here alive. The SAS was a pack, and within it were Units, and your Unit was family. They weren't about to endanger their own, or anyone else's family.

Then two gunmen entered alone, waiving their machine guns around, threatening the men and holding guard. The three men let their hostages go, one by one, now that the rest of the camp was under hostage as well. The crowd was so dense that if one of the gunmen opened fire with his machine gun that he couldn't help but hit half a dozen men, easily. They joined the two free gunmen and held the line, keeping the SAS men at bay. Then, it was time for them to put Alex on show.

The leader ground the barrel into the back of Alex's head in order to make him move. To step through the door and stand in front of all the camp. He felt ashamed. Maybe he should have yelled to one of those men outside before the gunmen caught them, warned them to arm themselves or something. But that would have gotten him killed. That would have gotten the other men killed. Alex didn't think he could take another death on his conscience right now.

He stepped, dejected and barefoot into the large room. Someone had cleared it, moving the tables up against the walls during the confusion. Maybe the gunmen had ordered the men to do it, Alex didn't know. But he felt alone in the space.

"Cub!" Snake called from the crowd, drawing attention. Alex shot a glance in his direction, but the leader had moved to stand beside him, and he felt the barrel against his brow. He felt foolish. Foolish and alone, shivering up here in the cold. He was barefoot and shirtless, a bandage over his heart and all his scars on display, with his head tilted to the side with the pressure of a pistol on his temple. He felt weak, and his heart ached, because he knew they just might not get out of here, and that it was his fault.

Taking over an SAS camp? Balaclavas and suicide missions? He couldn't kid himself on this one, it had Scorpia written all over it.

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	7. And so it Begins

Terribly sorry, it's another short chapter, but at least its on time! Like before, if you have any suggestions just let me know, or let me know what you think is gonna happen next! Cyber cookies if you call it correctly!

-Ara

P.S. wrote a short about Yassen and Alex in an elevator, you guys should check it out and let me know what you think! It's called Paying it Forward, by me, Ara Reed :P

* * *

He didn't dare look at the men in front of him, the thirty or so confused stares directed at him, so he turned to stare down the barrel of the gun to glare at his captor. He wouldn't be cowed by this bastard, he had had enough of the games. A moment ago he had felt embarrassed and nervous, alone and… afraid. But now he felt, empty. This was almost par for the course for him. Captured and paraded about, used.

"On your knees, Rider." The man spat, seeing something in Alex's eyes that he didn't like.

"Whatever you say." He breathed as he slowly sank to his knees. Alex took a moment to survey the situation and then looked resolutely at the ground, still unable to face the SAS men's gazes.

"Set up the equipment." The leader said into the crowd, and one of the gunmen broke away from guard duty to rush over to a TV and VCR set up in the corner of the room. It looked like something a school would use to watch informational videos, which was what the SAS used it for. Small classes were regularly held in the mess hall for the recruits when there were too many people to fit into the real classrooms. Alex had even attended one or two, catching up on information that he had missed in his sporadic bouts of training.

He took out a few devices from a bag slung around his shoulder. One looked like a regular DVD/Blu Ray player, another was a digital video camera, and the other was a bulky looking wifi router. He plugged everything in, finding an internet jack and rolling the TV stand over to it. It was ludicrous to Alex. All these people held at gunpoint, watching someone set up some outdated TV. The tension in the room spoke volumes, everyone just waiting to find out what this was all about, what these crazy people were up to. Alex wanted to know as well.

The video camera was angled to see the entire room, and it was recording. He could tell by the red light.

When the gunman was finished he approached the crowd of SAS men and grabbed one at random, dragging him to a spot equidistant between the other guards and their leader. He was made to kneel and face Alex, so that he could see the man's face. Alex's heart sank.

"I'll probably have to ask this more than once, but I'm willing to give you some incentive." The gunman with the hostage pulled out a pistol and pointed it at the man's head. The soldier's face barely moved, but Alex could see him tense. He was putting on a brave face. "Who are you?"

"You know who I am, you said my last name."

The man pistol whipped him across the jaw. Alex tasted blood. For a horrified moment he checked to make sure all his teeth were still in place, his mouth felt like it was on fire, but they were all still there. He must have cut his lip or bit his tongue. He couldn't tell.

He turned back and spat the blood on the man's army boots. It didn't seem to faze him.

"What is your name, and who do you work for?" He asked, prodding him in his aching jaw with the pistol.

"Cub, with the SAS."

The gunman cocked his weapon, a .38 revolver. It's fat, iconic barrel coming to rest on the soldier's temple.

The leader squatted down beside him and leaned closer. With one hand he gestured with the gun towards the camera, with the other he pulled back the black mask that obscured his face. "I can see your pupils dilate with fear." He whispered maliciously, smiling. "Look at the camera, kid, and tell us your real name."

Alex didn't look away. He was too shocked.

"Who do you work for?" The leader's eyes burrowed into Alex, unblinking, and Alex stared right back.

"Don't tell them anything, Cub!" Someone shouted from the crowd. Alex didn't need to look to tell who it was. Wolf just had to go and open his dumb mouth. "They won't…"

"Shut up! You don't know who you're dealing with, Wolf." Alex growled. He didn't take his eyes off the leader, who still crouched beside him. "They're assassins!"

"Oh we're more than that." The leader whispered, and then cracked him on the head again with the gun. He fell forward to the ground. Dazed, he didn't see the signal that the leader gave to his gunman, and he didn't see what happened when the gun went off.

He jerked at the sound and rested his head against the cold hard floor as someone screamed the soldier's name. A Unit member, no doubt. What had the man's name been? Some sort of cat or something. The name that his friend was yelling was unintelligible.

He picked himself up off the ground as they dragged the body away. "You…" He began, unable to find adequate words and unable to risk someone else to this madman's wrath.

"… have no one to blame but yourself." He said with cold eyes. "You'll get all of these good soldiers killed if you don't start cooperating on time, kid. You were always stubborn, but now it's time to listen, Alex Rider."

After disposing of the corpse, the free gunman returned to the crowd and dragged out a new hostage. Wolf. Bloody, stupid, Wolf, who drew attention to his dumb self. The revolver descended on his head and Wolf just glared forward. Not at Alex, for a change, but at the leader.

"Whatever it is that you want, Cub won't have the answers. Question one of us." Wolf said clearly and deliberately.

From Wolf's perspective it was a good plan. The soldiers were trained for this kind of situation, and no doubt Wolf would feel more secure with someone who could control it better. One soldier had already been killed, and he had to watch as a kid was questioned and abused. It's what Alex would have done, asked them to 'take me instead.' But Wolf didn't know what was going on here, for that matter neither did Alex, but he had more information than Wolf did. He had to stay right here.

The leader looked at Wolf with amusement. "Do you know anything? I'm not here to question anyone, I'm here to cause a bit of mayhem." He said, lifting the gun to point at Wolf.

Alex moved. Not for the gun, but for the space in between it and Wolf, the barrel once again pointed at his forehead. This time by choice.

"Stop this." He spat. His breath quickened and his chest hurt. He wanted to rub at his heart, to ease some of the building pain, to relax the tense muscles, but any move he made would be interpreted as a move for the gun.

The leader snorted. "Cute." His finger tightened around the trigger.

"Cub!" Wolf called sharply.

"You are my problem, Stecha, "Alex growled, "and you will deal with me."

There was an audible click as the man released the hammer and lowered his weapon. With a lazy motion he pulled the black mask all the way off his head, exposing himself to everyone in the room. "You caught on faster than I would have thought, Alex. Well done." He didn't smile, but instead grimaced in appreciation. "I could have sworn you would have played dumb for your friends' benefit."

He moved backwards, putting space in between himself and his captive. The gun still rested in his hands, but it was pointed toward the ground. Not exactly a safer situation, but anything that kept him from looking down the barrel of that gun again was a good thing.

"Will you cooperate now," Stecha asked, "or do I have to play with your friend… Wolf, was it?" He smiled viciously and Alex had no doubt whatsoever that he was serious.

The boy glared.

"What is your name? Who do you work for?"

"Alex Rider, I work for MI6."

"Say it to the camera, boy. It's all for them." He grinned.

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_**Review!**_


	8. Blackmail

Hello everyone! I do hope you all know by now that I am notorious for short chapters... sorry... but if I didn't you wouldn't get an update about once a week, instead we would be back to updates once a year, lol. But I am determined to finish this, and finish it in good time, so your help, suggestions, ect are very much welcome, because I'm slowing down on the writing since I want to get it just right and that's difficult...

I guess the purpose of this story is to get the full story from Alex. We never really heard about how he felt about the things that happened to him, not from the inside, so I want to try and show how he's stayed strong through all of this and how he's been affected by everything. Please tell me if I get too sappy, or too unemotional. I really want to be proud of this story!

Thank you,

Ara

* * *

Alex stared. "For who?"

The gun clicked, cocked again and on a hair trigger, pointed at Wolf's legs. "Don't make me repeat myself. Ever." Stecha's eyes narrowed at him, his brows knitting together.

The boy turned obediently to the little camera across the room and enunciated clearly, "My name is Alex Rider, I work for MI6."

"Now," Stecha started, motioning towards the TV stand, "that camera hooks up directly to an internet feed, it's streaming as we speak, and on the televisions of a select few of Britain's finest and most activist, is a little film we made of you.

"The parameters are simple: you will answer my questions, fully, or Wolf doesn't get to walk again. Your government will allow the film to play, or we blow up this entire compound on the internet, along with three other very busy, very important locations in London.

"For your part in this, you get to watch a few clips from the movie, and answer questions _truthfully._ Don't you dare lie about anything, Rider, no matter how bad it makes you look, no matter how bad it makes your government look, no matter how bad it makes SCORPIA look. The world deserves the truth, does it not? _You_ get to tell your story, to show everyone how much you have _sacrificed_ for them. How much you've done." The man sneered.

"Haven't you tried something like that before? It didn't work." He spat.

"Well, it was never our intention to actually expose you! Just paint some blame on the underage spy so that everyone would look the other way. We weren't trying to prove a point. But now, we are." Stecha waived his gun vaguely at the camera. "Now it's your turn to tell the story. And if you don't, your friend will get more than a bullet in his head. Maybe one to the knee would be more fun?" He shrugged noncommittally.

Alex sunk for a moment, hunching tiredly on his haunches, his knees sore against the ground where he knelt on the concrete. "Why do this, Stecha? SCORPIA's over, this does no one any good, much less you.

"How do you expect to get out of here? Huh?" The boy's voice raised. "You're in an enemy camp! They sent you on a suicide mission! You think MI6 is going to let any information about me air on television? They will burn this camp to the ground themselves just to keep me a secret." He snarled.

"But will they sacrifice those three locations in London, with all those precious civilians?" Stecha asked.

The silence was deafening.

Stecha's eyes narrowed. "I asked you a question, Rider."

_They just might_, Alex thought. The collateral damage from a leak like that was unfathomable, but explaining away a bunch of terrorist attacks was easy. They might even skew public sentiment to their favor. "You just never know with these people." He said instead, shaking his head.

"Who are you?" Wolf asked, wide eyed. "How do you know him, Cub? How do you know about SCORPIA?" These two were just prancing around highly classified information, bouncing state secrets off each other like they were playing badminton. And Cub, CUB, was neck deep in it.

"I trained with him at Malagosto, the SCORPIA training camp." Stecha smiled spitefully.

There was a buzz from the crowd of SAS men, looks were thrown between comrades and heads shook. Alex said nothing. Let the bastards think what they wanted. Right now they were nothing to him, the only thing he could do was play the game, as twisted as it was.

He needed to stall for time, and he knew that every second, every word mattered.

Alex shifted his gaze to Wolf, trying to gauge his reaction. There was a complicated mix of emotion there, most of it leaning towards anger and disgust. "We didn't like you, but we trusted you." Wolf said flatly.

"I never trusted you." Alex said back, letting the words ring clearly with honesty.

"And he's got reason for that, you know." Stecha butted in. He lifted the little remote, comically small in his grasp, and pressed a button. A transcript appeared on the little screen, too small to read. "Take my word for it, that is a transcript in Rider's file, detailing how he was blackmailed into working for MI6 just after the death of his Uncle, an MI6 agent. He was barely fourteen."

Alex stared desperately at a speck on the wall, ignoring the soldier's buzz as it grew.

"Tell us the details, Alex, every little thing you can think of."

_Stall_, the boy thought. "I… they…" Stecha's smile faltered. "They threated to put me in foster care!" He said quickly. He didn't think Stecha would give him another warning about Wolf. "They were going to deport… my housekeeper, she looked after me when Ian was gone." He couldn't say her name.

"And?"

Alex searched for something to add. What do you say about something like that? "I was scared. I was just a kid." Then he shook his head in disgust. "I didn't know what scared was, back then, but I didn't know what would happen if… she… left too.

"It was selfish of me." Alex added

"But you were a kid." Stecha led, and Alex nodded.

"You were the ones who stole my file, then? The reason I got sent to this hell hole?" Voice bitterly neutral, the boy looked into the man's eyes and searched, desperately. He had to figure this out.

"It's not so bad."

"Yeah, I guess I have had worse." Alex sniffed. Stecha snorted at that but decided to leave the crowd of soldiers in the dark. They would find out soon enough.

"So, I really do get to say whatever I want?" Alex asked, taking the moment with a grain of salt.

"Sure, go for it."

Alex turned around to face the leader of his Unit. "Wolf, you are a dumb, insufferable asshole." Hey, if he was going to die here, he might as well let off some steam. He had little doubt that he wouldn't be getting out alive.

These men had captured a camp full of SAS men. This was a suicide mission to begin with, much less if they had to escape with said camp full of men on their tails. This scenario ended in a bloodbath, and Alex was in the spotlight. If anyone survived, it wouldn't be him. Not unless he could think of something, or figure out their plan.

"Does that mean you'll shut up?" Wolf asked calmly.

"No, I'll do my best to keep your bits and pieces where they are." Alex sighed.

Wolf didn't look too upset by that. Yes, Alex was cooperating with the enemy, might even be the enemy, but on the other hand they had _killed_ one of them already and had threatened Wolf's ability to walk for the rest of his life.

The momentary banter lifted Alex's spirits just a tad. It was almost like he was in his element. This was where he did his best work, it helped him feel more in control. There was a spark of hope, somewhere down there, he knew. He just had to find the way out.

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	9. Stormbreaker

Sorry this is late... I had a lot of trouble writing it. I didn't seem to hit my stride on this one until the middle, so let me know if the first bit's decent ^_^. Also, its short as all hell... sorry again!

-Ara

* * *

Stecha lifted the remote again and pressed a button.

There was no sound, but you could easily imagine the tinkling of glass as it fell. The video was slowed, so that the light glinting off the shards played beautiful patterns on the screen. It blurred, a moment later, as the camera swiveled upwards towards the ceiling. Alex was there, hanging from the shredded fabric mass of his parachute, swinging and disoriented. But then his young face pinpointed on something, and with a quick motion he prepared and fired. The image blurred again, this time focusing on the Prime Minister, his hand bloodied and people all around him were screaming and rushing for cover.

"Thought they destroyed that." Alex muttered unhappily.

"They kept quite a few interesting pieces of evidence in your file, Alex. Not very smart of them, considering." Stecha said.

The boy sighed. "No, not really."

Once again there came a buzzing from the hive of trapped SAS men. "Yeah, yeah, I shot the Prime Minister!" Alex yelled at them. "Get over it! Bastard would have been much worse off if I hadn't. He should have thanked me."

"Because_ if_ you hadn't?" Stecha asked.

Alex glared, knowing he would have to answer. "Then he would have pressed a button that would set into motion some ridiculous plot! They're all ridiculous plots!"

"And this one in particular?"

The boy's nostrils flared in distaste. "Mr. Sayle, creator of the Stormbreaker, injected a virus into all the computers that he donated to the schools of London, intending on spreading an infectious disease that would kill many children." He paused. "Yassen Gregorovich mentioned that he was there to keep Sayle on track and on time, something about 'investors.' Was it SCORPIA that funded him?" Alex asked, trying to get something back from this circus. "I've always wondered." He said with a tilt of his head.

"No. Some Eastern European group, you wouldn't recognize the name. Yassen worked freelance after his time with SCORPIA, he went where the money took him. You know that." Stecha cooperated, and that surprised Alex. He was being so forward, so damnably helpful.

"What about your uncle, Alex?"

"He was killed." Alex shifted uncomfortably.

"How?" Stecha asked, a smile at having to pry it out of him.

"Assassinated."

"By whom?"

"Gregorovich."

"Distancing yourself, Alex? You used to call him Yassen." Stecha said. "Back when we interviewed you before joining SCORPIA it was 'Yassen this, Yassen that.' Now its Gregorovich."

"Well, him killing my uncle wasn't my fondest memory of him. Not that there were many fond memories, mind you." Alex rolled his eyes. The death of his uncle still pained him, but he had come to realize that he never really knew his uncle in the first place. He'd been gone so often and for so long on his missions, that the loss had never been as sharp as it should have. He should have been there one day and gone the next, but instead Alex's days went on the same as they always had, without Ian.

"Tell us what happened after your debriefing from that mission" He gestured to the paused scene on the small television, him hanging above a screaming crowd.

Alex sighed. He should get used to this. It sounded like he was going to live through every dramatic detail of his missions, and there were many of those moments. "Yassen saved my life." He wasn't about to spell it out for everyone. Watching Sayle die, and just waiting there while Yassen landed. He should have ran, or something. Why did he stay? "You can understand, then, why our relationship is a little strange."

"He killed someone, to save your life."

"I've killed people, to save my life." Alex said bluntly.

"But he's an assassin." Stecha entreated.

"And I'm a child, which is creepier?" Alex shot back. "You're dancing around some point, what is it?"

"You made my point pretty well right there." He laughed. "Only 15 and defending the actions of an assassin. The assassin that killed your uncle."

"I'm not defending him!" Alex shouted. "He was never my friend, just someone that watched my back."

"Did you trust him?"

"In the end." Alex growled, angry. It felt good to say the truth, finally, but it was difficult to put everything together in his head. This was the man that took the last of his family from him, and yet… he had trusted him. If he hadn't would Alex have gone to SCORPIA on Yassen's word? "It doesn't matter, he's dead."

"You sure about that?" The bastard smiled again. It was a sly smile, like he knew something Alex didn't.

"I watched him die." Alex said carefully. "He's dead."

The smile stayed on his face, mocking.

_He's dead_, Alex reassured himself.

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	10. Point Blanc

Right, so it's been a liiiiiiitle while, and its short again, so I made it really gruesome... enjoy!

- Ara

* * *

_"I watched him die." Alex said carefully. "He's dead."_

_The smile stayed on his face, mocking._

_He's dead, Alex reassured himself._

* * *

_He's messing with my head now?_ Alex paused in wonder. Stecha had been down-right helpful with his answers, and suddenly he's started playing mind games! Yassen was dead, he was sure of it.

Stecha took a long look at Alex, scanning his face.

In the silence, the soldier with the gun to Wolf's head shifted uncomfortably. He'd been standing for too long, it must have been more than an hour since this started. It seemed to be contagious, because everyone started shuffling, trying to get blood back into their legs, the weight of their body cutting off their circulation. It was a weakness, although not one he could exploit. No one was near enough. Maybe Wolf…

"You really don't know, do you?" Stecha asked finally, done searching his features for foul play.

"Know what?"

"Yassen is alive. MI6 cleaned up your mess and found him in the wreckage of that plane. He wasn't quite dead yet, and they managed to save his life. They kept him in their cells, interrogated him, but he apparently didn't let anything go." He shrugged. "It's a good thing too, cause they probably would have eliminated him if he did.

"Anyways, we knew, so when we broke in for your file, we let him out. We were hoping for a freebie job or something as thanks, but I guess the old man's gone into retirement. He's disappeared." Stecha sighed. "Not that there's a SCORPIA left to fight for."

"He's… alive?" Alex's eyes widened.

"You give a shit about that assassin?" Wolf spat.

"You don't know anything about it." Alex snapped back.

"Goddamnit, Cub! What the fuck is wrong with you?" Wolf shouted. "Bioterrorism, assassins, SCORPIA? What have you gotten yourself into?!"

"Oh… this and that." Alex replied sheepishly.

Stecha took that moment to clear his throat and press a button on the remote.

The image was of Alex, flying down a mountain on an ironing board, chased by snowmobiles equipped with machine guns. The boy veered into the woods, gunshots echoing through the little valley and an explosion following him through the trees. A second fireball guttered out on open turf after a show of Alex's boarding skills with a heel spin to the driver's face. From behind, you could see the boy slouch in relief, then tense. He veered off, swinging his board around erratically as if to evade attack by a ranged weapon.

The boy rode out of frame, but a document replaced the video on the screen. The words 'jumped a snow bank, landed on top of a train, and fell off the other side,' gradually grew larger. Alex could almost hear some sort of dramatic music, as if this were some educational movie he'd watched in school.

"That looks familiar." Wolf muttered.

Alex's head drew back in surprise. "You seriously made a documentary about me?"

"How else are we supposed to tell people?" Stecha shrugged. "Wolf! You tell me the story this time! You were the leading officer on the rescue mission, so you should know what happened."

Wolf shrugged slightly, this wasn't new to him. "The kid boarded down the mountain, fell off a train into a fence, and ended up in the hospital. He convinced the Deputy Director of MI6 to let him tag along with the squad I was temporarily commanding. We were supposed to detain the owner of the property, but Cub wanted to save his friends, or something. It was a private school, I guess they had some kids locked up in the basement." Wolf stopped and looked at Stecha. "The kid got into trouble, I tried to help him out but got shot. I took care of it."

"Helpful, aren't you?" Stecha smiled, leaving the 'took care of it' to be interpreted by the rest of the room. They knew what it meant.

"No sense in getting shot again if the kid would tell it to you in a second." Wolf glared at Alex.

"Who took care of the owner of the property?" Stecha asked.

"The kid." Wolf said darkly. Alex didn't respond, Dr. Grief was one of the least of his sins.

Stecha paused for effect, but not long. "Do you know _why_ he was so desperate to get down that mountain?"

Wolf shrugged. "Got scared?" He suggested, but even he didn't seem to believe it, not after a month with the kid.

"You could say that." Stecha snorted, lifting the remote again.

An older man in a lab coat leaned over a table, a thrashing human being strapped to the metal slab. You couldn't tell whether the person was male or female, they were covered in blue cloth except for the torso, a homogenous slab of bruised flesh slowly being peeled back to reveal the muscle beneath.

Alex exhaled shakily, the situation on the TV sinking in.

A Y incision exposed his ribs, which rose and fell so quickly with the screams that must have come from underneath the cloth that the man in the lab coat had a hard time pinning back the skin. Then the man picked up a pair of bolt cutters, but the image went black before he could start snipping off the ribcage.

The room muttered.

"That's why. Dr. Grief threatened young Alex Rider with being dissected alive."

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	11. Interlude

I seem incapable of writing a long chapter, and I also seem incapable of writing on time right now, classes are kickin my ass :/

... I'm sorry...

- Ara Reed

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_"That's why. Dr. Grief threatened young Alex Rider with being dissected alive."_

* * *

"We got this from Dr. Grief's old files." Stecha gesticulated in agitation at the TV. "You could say pretty definitively that he wasn't giving Alex an empty threat."

Wolf stared wide-eyed at Alex, looking for reassurance that this was just some messed up dramatization, that this was just from some twisted movie, like _Hostel_.

"He was one sick fuck." Alex said, a little freaked out. That could have been him, drawn out on a metal slab, being taken apart organ by organ. Slowly, for the pleasure of another.

"Can this be real?" Someone from behind Snake asked, whispering into the ambient muttering of the crowd.

"Jaguar was real enough." Eagle turned to said to the whisperer, referring to the soldier killed less than an hour before.

The whisperer paused and that made Snake turn to look at his expression. The man was Raven, one of the soldiers captured with Cub. His dark features looked drawn in the semi-dark room, his jaw was set in frustration or anger. "I mean the kid." The man said. "Our country wouldn't do somethin' like that, would they?" He said _our country_, like this was very important to him.

Snake looked at him blankly, not knowing what to say. Then he glanced back at Cub, the intense look on his face as he spoke to Stecha about himself, about fear, about death. Snake was sure that Cub was a great liar, but something about this made sense. It didn't make sense logically, but it seemed so rational to picture Cub in battle. It was like he was made for it.

"I don't know." Snake finally said. Doubt was sinking into the crowd of SAS men. He could hear conversations just like their own all around him. Snake wished he could say that no one knew Cub like K-Unit, that they knew a story or two about him and where he came from, and that maybe they could say this was all a crazy bluff, but he couldn't. The truth was that no one knew who Cub was beyond the tough exterior and the nightmares.

No one knew for sure whether these men were telling the truth.

"Why didn't you wait for backup?" Wolf asked, still astonished.

"I did!" Alex snapped, not in the best of moods, considering. "I waited! But I got caught and the crazy bastard threatened me with… with that!" He jabbed a finger at the TV screen. "Tell me you'd stick around for that!"

Alex felt full of righteous fury. Blunt had stationed an entire bloody unit on that mountain, but had neglected to send them in. He'd already pressed the distress button, what more did the man want him to do? Send up a flare?

"You were supposed to extract me!" Alex yelled. "Maybe if you had I wouldn't have fallen off a train!"

"I didn't have orders." Wolf glared stonily, his own voice raising.

"Do you need orders to save a kid from being tortured, or just agents?" Alex snarked.

"I didn't even know it was you in there, Cub! I get my information from MI6, they only told me to stand by."

Alex devolved into curses, the expletives all circling around Blunt's name. He seethed inside, but didn't want to let his emotions get the better of him. He knew there was more to come and already the anger he had felt, the disgust with MI6, was bubbling up. Never before had he been justified in his anger towards them, but now there was this man before him, telling him that it wasn't his fault or his burden. It was the first time since… Jack… that someone told him to be pissed. The fact that he was the enemy made it all the more creditable, yet made him all the more wary.

With a sudden chill he knew that they would ruin him. It froze the curses in his mouth.

"I would have come for you if I'd known." Wolf said into the silence. Alex's head snapped up and stared hard into the older man's eyes. He didn't say anything, just stared.

He was telling the truth, of course. The dumb bastard meant it. Alex sighed.

"Yeah, well, don't go trusting MI6 anymore." He said simply. Wolf wisely kept his mouth shut, despite having just taken advice about his job from a teenager.

Minutes passed by in awkward silence. Stecha watched them for signs of a continued argument, the guards stood stoically with their guns, even the soldiers began to quiet down after a minute or so.

Finally, Stecha took the initiative. "You were asked to do a favor by MI6, what was it?"

Alex looked confused for a moment, then asked, "Wimbledon?" His captor nodded.

"I don't know. They handed me a pass to be a ball boy and mentioned that there'd been a break in and I should take a look in between games. It didn't sound serious at the time."

"And yet you took the pass?"

"I figured I would go, take a peak, pretend like I'd done something or solve it or something, and enjoy Wimbledon. It's not an opportunity you get everyday, you know." Alex rationalized slowly. He knew it sounded stupid, but it was true.

"And did you solve it?" Stecha asked.

Alex rolled his eyes. "Yes, the Triads were trying to rig the games." He said flatly, tired of Stecha's leading questions. "And before you ask, yes, they tried to exact revenge; no, I obviously didn't die; and yes, MI6 used this as a bargaining chip to talk me into another mission. That's what you were going to ask, is it not?"

Stecha grimaced a smile and nodded, then motioned for Alex to continue. Tired with it all, he didn't immediately speak, so, in a blur of motion, Stecha drew his weapon and fired at the ground next to Wolf's knee. The concrete shattered and Wolf barely grunted as little bits of it imbedded in his thigh.

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	12. The Effects

Yo people! Sorry for the wait. School got all crazy and stuff... and stuff... it's been a while and I really only have a regular sized chapter to put up so that's totally my bad. :\

Anywho, this is my new chapter, I'm not expecting too many more cause it's gonna go by pretty quickly from here on out, but I expect I might make an epilogue or two, or make up something new... who knows.

Thank you everyone for sticking around, reviews are always helpful and I like to see the numbers even if you just tell me to update soon. It doesn't help, but it makes me feel better about myself :P

* * *

_Stecha grimaced a smile and nodded, then motioned for Alex to continue. Tired with it all, he didn't immediately speak, so, in a blur of motion, Stecha drew his weapon and fired at the ground next to Wolf's knee. The concrete shattered and Wolf barely grunted as little bits of it imbedded in his thigh._

* * *

"Are you fucking insane?!" Alex shouted, jumping to his feet. He had thought he could hold it together, stall for time, or something, but Stecha had gotten on his last nerve.

Wolf didn't move, allowing the blood to dribble from his thigh like nothing had happened. He wore a blank expression, one of complete control.

"Are you?" Stecha asked. "You toy with the Chinese Triads and then run into the welcoming arms of not only MI6, but another intelligence agency."

Alex's nostrils flared and his fingers massaged against his palm as he clenched and unclenched his fists.

"The CIA is really no better than MI6, are they?" Stecha smiled viciously, lifting is arm to point the remote again.

It was an image of a vertical tunnel, a ladder presumably leading to the top and a bottom filled with water. Nothing happened for a while, but then two divers entered and stood in the stomach deep water. As soon as they appeared, they disappeared. The walls, clawed and spiked swung in on them, quickly and with force. There was a splash, and then the remnants were sucked away by the ocean as water flowed back into the tunnel.

"They were good people." Alex said, upset. He had never thought he would watch his once 'partners'' demise. It wasn't something he had wanted to see. He had to control his breathing so he didn't gag.

"But _you_ didn't fall for that trap, did you?"

"I was lucky." Alex snapped as Stecha gestured once again with the gun. He would happily have shoved that damn gun down Stecha's throat if he could. In fact, his fingers itched for the chance.

"And then comes along General Sarov, is he just another man with a ridiculous plan?" The remote rose again.

A panning shot revealed a harbor with derelict submarines, some rolled onto their sides. They appeared dark and menacing, their long black bodies letting on to what dwelt within them.

"Murmansk, home to retired Soviet nuclear submarines. General Sarov wanted to detonate them and take out half of Europe. That doesn't seem ridiculous to me, that seems very serious." Stecha admonished, pressing a button.

Alex brandished a metal rod on the video. He swung as hard as he could, hitting his hulking attacker in the shoulder, but the man was unfazed. Conrad ripped the pole out of his hands and viciously tacked him in the ankle, sweeping Alex's legs out from under him. The fuzzy security camera couldn't catch the features of Alex's attacker, but you could sense that he was smiling, or at least trying to smile.

Alex remembered Conrad's scarred face, and how only half of it would lift when he smiled. Things had happened so quickly that they were a blur to Alex, so watching it play out in front of him was made him feel almost justified.

Conrad flung the rod away and rolled up his sleeves. His large hands wrapped around Alex's throat, the boy's smaller fingers clutching uselessly at the man's tightening fists. Alex's head tipped only slightly to the side, but then his smaller body went limp. The man kept his fingers tight around his neck, but in one fast motion Alex lashed out, breaking contact for just a moment. Miraculously, the man continued upwards, floating out of picture. A moment later, as Alex lay prone and gasping, the crane magnet swung into view, an arm dangling from beneath the only indication of where Conrad had gone.

"There's one down." Stecha mumbled clearly. Alex's eyes narrowed.

The video skipped to new views, following him across the compound where it could, capturing him as he flinched at various explosions and avoiding the lights of helicopters until he finally reached the giant metal box on the edge of the harbor.

Alex fiddled with it, making a motion as if to swipe a credit card at the computer on the box. The boy sagged with relief for a moment, but you could see Sarov from the camera angle, sneaking up behind him. The older man's lips moved and Alex looked surprised. He said something back, his posture making him seem defiant. Sarov lifted his gun, clearly warning him, but Alex flicked something into the sea, deliberately shouting words.

Sarov stiffened his arm ready to pull the trigger, but at the last moment he spun the weapon around and rested it against his own temple. Alex took one step towards him, but he was too late. He flinched back and stumbled in surprise, then fell backwards in shock. He sat for a moment, staring, until someone ran into frame and pulled him away.

"Death." Stecha said quietly. "It's not like you were new to it, even then. Why the reaction? What, exactly, did you say to make him do such a thing?" There was a mean glint to the man's cold eyes. The room stood still.

"He wanted to adopt me." Alex said, not hesitating. Not far away Wolf still quietly bled. "I told him that I would rather die than be his son." He raised cold eyes to the soldiers in front of him. He wouldn't explain himself to them, he would stand tall and hard because this was all he had left. He would not be ashamed.

"So he was crazy."

"Don't call him that!" Alex snapped automatically.

"He tried to take out Europe." Stecha said maliciously.

"He was…" Alex struggled for words.

"You're crazy." Stecha whispered, the room so quiet that they could all hear it.

Alex's eyes darkened and he took a small shuffle towards Stecha. "Don't write me off so easily, don't write off anyone so easily."

"Why? Most would agree with me." Stecha shrugged and looked to the crowd behind him. It was like an audience to him, but they didn't have the full story. They only got the insane bits, the explosions, the catch-phrases, like in a movie.

"Don't look at them like that! They don't know anything about it!" Alex raised his voice, pointing a finger and sweeping it across the crowd. "They didn't hear about how Sarov lost his son, or how Sayle was treated as a foreigner. They might be crazy, considering, but they're still people. Sarov was a person, no matter how much money he had, or how much power he wielded, he was just as human as anyone else. He committed suicide because he was human." _He committed suicide because of me._

"Must I reiterate that he tried to destroy _Europe_?" Stecha gestured theatrically. "It's sort of a big swathe of the Earth; instant nuclear wasteland!"

"Your super-villains don't exist, Stecha. They never have, and they never will. What you're looking at is someone fucked in the head and tired of seeing the world that they live in."

"Are you tired of seeing this world yet, Alex?"

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	13. Fast-Forward

Hello! New chapter! Yay!... I had to rewrite it once or twice since I sort of lost track of who my characters are. I got to feeling all dramatic and needed to take a step back, but I think I'm better now!

Thank you everyone for your amazing reviews, they make me feel good about myself so keep 'em comin'!

P.S. I know that some of these videos prolly couldn't have been taken, but just assume that they were taken on a helicopter or something...

P.S.S. I rewrote this so many times I don't know what to think of how it turned out, I'm doubting myself on the last bit. What do you guys think?

* * *

_"Your super-villains don't exist, Stecha. They never have, and they never will. What you're looking at is someone fucked in the head and tired of seeing the world that they live in."_

_"Are you tired of seeing this world yet, Alex?"_

* * *

"Yeah, someone else is fucked in the head." Someone behind Snake muttered. Snake spun, but wasn't able to identify the speaker.

"Standing up for some murderer, who does this kid think he is?" Someone else whispered to Snake's right. He spun again and saw Eagle's jaw set as he also heard the voices around him.

"I don't know what the fuck is going on, Eagle, but we have got to support Cub." Snake said quietly. "He can't do this on his own, he's just a kid."

"Looks like he's done plenty." Eagle growled. Snake looked at him in shock.

"What is wrong with you? This is Cub, our team-mate!"

* * *

"Nuclear war." Stecha said slowly.

Air Force One broke apart as Damian Cray was made into a wet, red, cloud, Alex staring after him from the open door before being thrown back. The engine exploded and the plane was sent into a tail-spin, finally tossing and rolling as the wings were torn off.

"Assassins."

He fast forwarded through some more evidence and then stopped to play Yassen Gregorvich being taken off of the plane. Archival videos popped up, showing Yassen killing, running, preparing, stalking.

More video exposed him in his training at Malagosto, shooting targets, rolling around with his fellow students, learning pressure points and poisons, tactics and techniques.

Even more video played. All-out war was being waged below him as he climbed the rope up to the platform on the weather balloon. Many of the soldiers before him were muttering, the consensus being that more than a few of them were at that battle themselves. Not long after reaching the platform a fire broke out on the balloon and a man fell to his death. Alex was seen commandeering the broken balloon and letting it drift him to safety.

"Betrayal."

Alex with a gun, pointing it at Deputy Head Jones and pulling the trigger. The glass before him shattered, previously unnoticed, and he was dragged away.

Ash lay bleeding on the floor, mouth moving silently as the picture fuzzed in and out. He was confessing, Alex remembered, to the murder of his mother and father. His eyes narrowed and his breath thinned.

"Destruction."

He reversed the tape a bit and let everyone watch as Ark Angel disintegrated into small pieces in the atmosphere, a bright blotch against the night sky.

A dam exploded, flooding a valley below.

A shockwave shook an oil rig, causing the water to billow slightly, but little came of the apparent explosion.

"Your own death." Stecha grinned in near pleasure.

He walked out of the Royal and General, face screwed up in confusion. The cameras were so good that you could see the confusion in his eyes and Alex remembered exactly what was going through his counterpart's mind; his parents. Who had they been, what had they wanted, were they really killed on that plane, was he being manipulated again? None of it had made sense at the time. It still didn't, really. His distraction had been why he hadn't glanced at the rooftops like he had taken to doing only a week earlier. He had been wary of retaliation from Scorpia.

The Alex on the television screen stepped up to the curb, waiting for the walking signal. It turned and he started forward, his foot scraping air as he stepped down. Something punched across his chest, and he stumbled backwards to counter the sudden force. Alex could see himself take a testing breath, afraid of pain or injury, but he didn't feel anything. He took another breath and blood spilled through his fingers, which clutched at his chest, turning his shirt red. He tried to take another, but blood trickled from his mouth.

The boy in the video collapsed, crumpling limply to the pavement. Civilians stopped and stared, MI6 guards rushed out of the nearby bank, and an ambulance approached, but you could tell from the video that Alex wasn't there.

* * *

Snake's lips thinned and he pushed his way back to the front of the crowd, leaving Eagle behind. How could they not see it? How did everyone else miss the pain on Cub's face, the way he had rubbed at his chest at each incident, the way that the kid's eyes got clearer, darker, with each video. A flash of rage ran through Snake. How could they?

How could the SAS do this? How could MI6 do this? How could he condone this? He should be up there protecting Cub, but he wasn't. He was back here.

* * *

"They don't know what to think, Alex." Stecha said evenly. "Are you strong? Are you insane? Are you for real?" He paused to take a long look at Alex himself, as if he couldn't quite put him together himself and he knew the entire story. "Tell the viewers back home what drives you."

Alex took a deep breath and let it out. "I don't know." He glanced at the TV and saw himself bleeding to death on the ground. Everyone saw the fear in his eyes and heard the shaky breath, it was that silent in the room. Stecha was right, they wanted to know what to think.

"I guess it was all about being afraid of the alternative." Alex said openly, he didn't want to give Stecha another reason to take a pot-shot at Wolf. He was feeling a little too delicate for that at the moment. He felt naked again and had one hand over his bandage as though the gunshot wound was shameful. Maybe it was, being caught up in something like that at such a young age.

He should have been enraged by the string of videos, these emotions were so private to him, but it just made him tired. So much had happened over the last few years that sometimes it all blended together. He couldn't really remember all the things he'd done, they had been a blur when they happened and now they were even worse in his memory. He felt detached and didn't know if it was a blessing or a curse that he had spotty long-term memory of his missions, but he could remember one fresh memory that plagued him…

His fingers clawed at his chest as he suppressed it.

Stecha watched the thoughts flit across Alex's face but didn't comment. "Elaborate?"

Alex took a single step to the side, non-threatening. "Like you said, Murmansk would have taken out most of Europe, including England. Am I supposed to just let them kill me? I live there. And even if I didn't care about all those strangers, everyone I know is there, am I supposed to just let them kill my friends and family? I don't want to know what it's like to go on without them." He choked out the last sentence, realizing what he had just said.

Stecha tipped his head. "That didn't work out so well, did it?"

"Don't you dare." Alex felt his heart stop, his chest throbbed in response. His breath shortened.

"Choose." Stecha pointed the gun at Wolf. "Your 'friend's' life or the truth, Alex?" He didn't smile, but he looked deeply interested, excited even. "At least _I'm_ giving you a choice."

"Fucking kill me first." Alex growled, advancing a step to draw the attention of Stecha's weapon. He wasn't about to make a decision, and the rage was suddenly back full force. He was sure they could see it on his face. It would be like choosing between his own life and Wolf's and he knew which he would rather gamble with.

"Okay." Stecha shrugged and shot him.

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